Most parents understand intuitively that praise is important — that positive reinforcement supports children's behaviour and self-esteem. What is less intuitive, and more surprising when the research is presented, is that how you praise matters enormously: that specific types of praise reliably produce better outcomes than others, and that some forms of praise and reward, though well-intentioned, can actively undermine the intrinsic motivation and resilience they are intended to build.
Understanding what the research on praise, rewards, and motivation says — and what it means for everyday interactions with young children — is one of the more practically useful applications of developmental psychology for parents.
Healthbooq supports parents with evidence-based guidance on the everyday interactions that shape children's development, including the research on praise, motivation, and how children develop persistence and resilience.
Process Praise vs Person Praise
The most important distinction in the praise literature is between process praise and person praise. Process praise focuses on effort, strategy, or approach: "you worked really hard on that puzzle," "I liked the way you tried a different approach when the first one didn't work," or "you kept going even when it was difficult." Person praise focuses on a fixed trait or ability: "you're so clever," "you're amazing at drawing," or "you're such a good girl."
Carol Dweck's research, spanning decades and multiple countries, has consistently shown that children who receive process praise develop a growth mindset — the belief that abilities can be developed through effort and practice. When they encounter difficulty, they persist. When they fail, they attribute it to insufficient effort and try again. Children who receive person praise tend to develop a fixed mindset — the belief that ability is fixed and innate. When they encounter difficulty, they disengage; failure feels like a statement about who they are rather than what they did.
In practice, this means: praise the specific, observable thing the child did or tried, not their global qualities. "You sat still and listened to the whole story — that was good concentrating" is more useful than "you're so good." "You kept trying even when the blocks kept falling" is more useful than "you're brilliant at building."
The Problem with Excessive Praise
Research by Jennifer Henderlong Corpus and others has shown that excessive, vague, or inflated praise can reduce children's intrinsic motivation — their internal interest in and enjoyment of an activity for its own sake. A child who is repeatedly told that a drawing is "amazing" and "incredible" may become more focused on producing praise than on the pleasure of drawing itself, and more vulnerable to situations where praise is not forthcoming.
Sincere, specific, earned praise is more motivating than inflated, generic praise. Noticing and commenting specifically on what a child did and what the result was ("you mixed those two colours together and got orange — did you expect that?") supports curiosity and engagement more than reflexive "great job" responses.
Rewards and Sticker Charts
Tangible rewards (sticker charts, small prizes) can be effective for establishing new behaviours that the child is not yet intrinsically motivated to perform — but they need to be used thoughtfully. The "overjustification effect" in motivation research describes the well-documented finding that when external rewards are introduced for an activity a child already intrinsically enjoys, their intrinsic interest in the activity decreases. Children who were intrinsically motivated to draw and then received prizes for drawing showed less interest in drawing when the prizes were removed than children who had never been rewarded.
Rewards work best when: used for establishing new, specific behaviours (not for generally "being good"); phased out gradually as the behaviour becomes established; and used alongside verbal process praise rather than as a substitute for it.
Key Takeaways
The way adults praise children and use rewards significantly influences children's motivation, persistence, and relationship with effort. Process praise ('you worked really hard on that') consistently produces better outcomes than person praise ('you're so clever') in terms of motivation, persistence after failure, and willingness to attempt challenging tasks. Excessive or indiscriminate praise can reduce intrinsic motivation. Rewards can be useful for establishing new behaviours but should be phased out as the behaviour becomes established to avoid replacing intrinsic with extrinsic motivation. These principles from motivation science have practical implications for everyday interactions with young children.
